LISTEN. all I want is a Big Strong Girlfriend and a Fancy Foppish Boyfriend is that SO MUCH to fucking ask. and they’re both taller than me.
I want to tenderly bandage my boyfriend’s finger as he tearfully recounts how he got a paper cut while our girlfriend drags home the deer she caught with her bare hands to lovingly feed us through the cold, cold winter. What’s so fucking hard to understand.
You may be wondering what I contribute to this hypothetical polyamorous thruple, and the answer is quite simple. I’m the one with a job.
work was slow today so I kind of ended up babysitting my coworker’s kid for most of it. she kept putting little pieces of black tape on her face to look like facial hair and then pretending to rob the cash register, and when she took them off I asked her if she’d seen the mustachio’d villain anywhere. she pointed towards the back so I promised I’d handle him and then came back with a napkin full of tomato sauce and said “there… that’s all that’s left of him…” and she lost her fucking mind
“I guess there’s a plan for all of us. I had to die…twice…just to figure that out. Like the book says, he works his work in mysterious ways. Some people like it…some people don’t.”
Though the Hardy Boys were introduced in the 1920s, Nancy Drew is far older. The first known story “Agnese Drü unde mearc Grendls mödr” dates to 788, and depicts the protagonist investigating rumors of a beast that torments the mead hall of a Danish king.
love when a mutual has a new blorbo and they keep putting posts on my dash that are completely incomprehensible. it’s like watching a friend win a game show in a language I don’t speak. I don’t have a fucking clue what’s happening to you but it’s nice to see you happy
