leaper182:

kgschmidt:

avelera:

sunspotpony:

prettyinpixiedust:

So one day a dwarf is talking to a human and finally realizes that when humans say woman, they generally mean “person who is theoretically capable of childbirth” because for whatever reason, humans assign social expectations based genital differences. (What a fucked up culture, the dwarf thinks.) But hey, better communication! So the next time the dwarf introduces theirself, they say, oh, by the way, I am what you call a “woman.”

And the trade negotiations just stop. They just stop cold. The tall people insist on speaking to the man, they insist on talking to the lady dwarf about all sorts of irrelevant bullshit, like recipes and childrearing and perfume

so the dwarf goes back home, enraged

and is like “BTW guess what happened, we’re all just going to be men forever now as far as the tall ones are concerned”

and everyone is justly horrified at this barbarism but they all agree to do whatever  it takes to squeeze those tall bastards for all the resources they are worth

and the dwarves get surlier, and the trade agreements less generous

and the tall people are all “what a miserable and greedy race”

but really they’re just still nursing a grudge about how goddamn backwards and sexist the tall people are

because their best negotiator, one of their sacred cave people, got snubbed the instant she said she was capable of childbirth – and a mortal insult like that can never be forgiven

Because Pi’s tags are great:

#yes good #personal headcanon: dwarves have fundamentally misunderstood human pronoun usage #and gender roles #they are very perplexed by it #eventually they went ‘fuck it apparently ‘he’ is the correct word’ #‘it’s their language and they keep using it for us’ #so then you have this situation where dwarves are cognizant of the words ‘mother’ and ‘wife’ #but not the usual use of ‘she’ secondary headcanon specific to Tolkien dwarves #dwarves that choose to bear children are held in high regard #because they are making new dwarves it is the ultimate craft #that’s what mahal did you made a new person #it is very impressive #everyone is impressed

Just as an additional thought, we hear that women dwarves generally stay within the mountain and are a protected, guarded subset of the dwarves. There’s not many of them, so there’s an implication that women dwarves are too precious to be allowed out.

But what if this too is a mistranslation? What if the dwarves were talking to the Men and when asked “where are all your women?” they hit a wall. They whisper amongst themselves, and eventually come back with a question, “What’s a woman?” The Men are incredulous.

“Why, the members of your race that bear children, of course!" 

More dwarven whispering.

They reach the conclusion that Men mean dwarves who are currently pregnant. Well! Of course those dwarves are currently safe within the mountain, well cared for and generally loathe to travel until the child is born. The Men take this to mean that all dwarven women are discouraged from traveling, and that their primary purpose is childbearing. Dwarves find this a satisfactory outcome, especially with the way Men treat their women, and so even when the misunderstanding becomes clear to them they never correct it.

I have never converted to fan-canon so hard before.

Sweeeeet.

With the greatest of respect gents, you or I simply don’t get to decide what women find objectionable. We have no more right than I, as a white man am able to decide whether or not black people get to wrap the ‘N’ word round their tongues, however distasteful I may find the connotations of the term.

We’ve never been routinely pilloried, censured or even executed due to which genomic sequence our bodies happen to carry.

We rarely get passed over for work because our nipples happen to reside a couple of inches further away from our ribcage.

The unassailable fact is that women still don’t have equality. Either grow up and deal, or come back to me in another five hundred years, when woman have had the vote for the same amount of time as we have, and we’ll talk about how unfair yet spectacularly empowering a Wonderbra is.

The fact that you’re engraged is amusing to me. Don’t worry pumpkin, one day you’ll come to terms with fangirl marginalization. Maybe, generations from now, your fangirl descendents will actually spend as much money on comics as The Men do. Of course by then it won’t matter because apes will have taken over the world and outlawed the works of annoying hack bitches like faith hicks, vanessa davis and all the contributors of womanthology (the book that charity created because no one who appreciates good writing would buy it otherwise). Female bloggers will no doubt live as mutants underground where their whining will no longer be heard.

So I made a post on my book blog recommending some graphic novels/comics for my readers, partially as a response to seeing a whole bunch of guys lately (more so than usual) insisting that girls don’t read comics and comics aren’t for girls anyway.

I got one comment. From this dude. And I had to share.

(via amynta)