People who don’t want to read The Martian in case the science is too complicated should be informed that it contains the lines “The best way to store the ingredients of water is to make them be water”, “It is of course dangerous to set off an explosive device on a spacecraft”, and “If I cut a hole in the wall of the hab, the air won’t stay inside any more”.
I love this fucking book
“I’ve said the words kilowatt-hours-per-sol so many times they’ve lost all meaning so I’m going to call them pirate-ninjas.
“So I need to generate nine hundred pirate-ninjas…”
there’s an entire chapter dedicated to him wondering how the cubs are doing while he’s stuck on mars, dying
I like the part where the guys on Earth are like “He thinks we all gave up on him, and that he’s completely alone. I wonder what he’s thinking about right now.”
And he’s like “How come Aquaman can control whales?”
“
As with most of life’s problems, this one can be solved by a box of pure radiation.
“
“Actually, I was the very lowest ranked member of the crew. I would only be “in command” if I were the only remaining person.”
Two pages later… “What do you know? I’m in command”
“Me: “This is obviously a clog. How about I take it apart and check the internal tubing?” NASA: (after five hours of deliberation) “No. You’ll fuck it up and die.” So I took it apart.
And my personal favorite :”
Also, I have duct tape. Ordinary duct tape, like you buy at a hardware store. Turns out even NASA can’t improve on duct tape.
Yes, of course duct tape works in a near-vacuum. Duct tape works anywhere. Duct tape is magic and should be worshiped.”
I want to believe that the dead are not lost to us. That they speak to us as part of something greater than us. Greater than any alien force. And if you and I are powerless now, I want to believe that if we listen to what’s speaking, it can give us thepowertosaveourselves.
What if water didn’t have surface tension and whenever you spilled some, the whole floor of your entire apartment was covered in a 2 micrometer deep puddle
you’ve taught me to count blessings I didn’t know were mine
Apparently, back in the day, there was a really notorious tie in novel for Star Trek that had a lot of slash elements called Killing Time
The slash elements were requested to be removed by Paramount, and they were, BUT due to a mistake, the original was sent to print without the edits
When it was caught, they’d printed 250k of this “first edition” which subsequently became collectors items for Kirk/Spock fans, since later editions DID include the edits censoring the slash
NOW, I bring this up because my friend who’s into the original Star Trek found and was reading the first edition at the desk at the library we work at, cause we’re slow on weekends and we’re the only ones here. She laughs at it, so I ask and she tells me about the general backstory of the book, and that she laughed because (among other things) Kirk, who doesn’t get mad in the og series really, was being described as hot headed and apparently just getting into fights left and right
So I’m looking over her shoulder at the scene, commenting on the character changes that resemble modern fic-degradation of characterization for the sake of a shipping dynamic, when I realize something
Now, my only interaction with the Star Trek series directly was the 2009 reboot, and my friends hasn’t seen those and is only interested in the originals. As I’m looking at this scene, and my friend is pointing out the character changes to Kirk, I realize that this is the fucking premise of the reboot, down to the fucking alternative timeline shenanigans, the rank swap, and Kirk being a hotheaded fuck up
The 2009 film was literally based on this slash fiction misprint they tried to bury!
Im reeling.
I can’t be the only one who made this connection.
So I google to see if anyone else has, and oh yes, good, there was someone
The fucking author of Killing Time
…I feel like I’ve uncovered a conspiracy. I’ve still got 3 hours left in my shift and I can’t focus. The world must know.
