mystical tech support

Thinking about that time earlier this year when the director of my dept at work came over and says “Rachel, my favourite person who knows about computers”

AND LIKE, ok yes, technically I am a computer scientist but the thing is that my job isn’t tech support – it’s other stuff and we have a whole IT dept who are great at tech support. So like, I am extremely wary of being too helpful about this stuff because time spent troubleshooting someone’s computer, is time not spent doing my job that no one else is going to do and plus like… since I am not in the IT dept, I genuinely do not know about a whole bunch of problems you can get with your computer. I google like everyone else.

Anyway, he brings over his laptop tablet thingy and says that it won’t turn on. SO OF COURSE my answer starts with “have you asked IT?” and he’s vague like he doesn’t want to because he thinks maybe it’ll be quicker if I help. And then I’m like “WELL I GUESS YOU CAN’T TURN IF OFF AND ON AGAIN”

And he’s like “No.” because haha it is extremely obvious. So because I know I must be a GIANT TROLL about this and because he’s maybe 5-10 years older than me and is in the right age bracket for exactly the nonsense I say next, I say “Have you tried BLOWING in it??” 

And he’s like “Like a computer game cartridge” and blows into the laptop as many have blown into ye old sega/nintendo cartridge.


And then he realises that he is not going to get any sensible answers from me and that he should call IT and goes back into his office, where he presses the button on the laptop again while he’s calling actual tech support AND THE THING TURNS ON. Hahahaha

And this is how he learned not to ask me for tech support because I will suggest nonsense and the whole ILLOGICAL nature of it all when it turns out to work is not worth the mind-boggling part of trying to figure out how.