argumate:

hey babe did it hurt when you fell from heaven? it did huh, emotionally, right I get that, because of the– yeah the irreconcilable separation from goodness as a result of a single decision that can never be undone or atoned for, uh huh, sounds rough

chotomy:

chotomy:

getting an archaeology degree did not make me smarter but it did take me from “lmao isn’t it funny some people think the pyramids were built by aliens” to “i will put venomous snakes in your washing machine if you so much as lightly suggest the pyramids were built by aliens”

why is this getting notes again *sees ancient aliens trending on twitter* oh, Motherfucker?