how to turn the signs on


Aries: summon a couple hundred demons to be their servants and you’ll be off to a decent start

Taurus: only ancient Gregorian chants can excite Tauruses

Gemini: inappropriately timed references to shows that have been off the air for years

Cancer: two words: Yugioh Cards

Leo: speak only in Latin

Virgo: only direct appeals to the Ancient Gods of old will appease a Virgo

Libra: the whispers of the void are more than enough already

Scorpio: Send them back to the dimension from which they came

Sagittarius: I dunno, advanced trigonometry?

Capricorn: you can’t turn a Capricorn on. I’m sorry, that’s just how it works.

Aquarius: science

Pisces: slap them with a fish. trust me it works. 

Well I do have a Gregorian chant only radio station saved into my internet radio…