Hey does anyone have that painting of the Argonath but they’re dabbing? I don’t need it for anything but I do want to inflict it on all my followers again.
villains are hard to design. making them ugly is dangerous, depending on what traits you choose to frame as monstrous or undesirable, you could very well end up saying something fatphobic, racist, anti-semitic, etc
but if you make a hot villain then people will get thirsty and demand redemptions and refuse to acknowledge their evil actions, no matter how despicable
Solution: Full body armor and masks. You don’t see people shipping themselves with Sauron!
…………..you think?
…………..don’t look up Sauron on AO3
Nothing fails to crack me up like this post – the vain hope that somewhere out there is some awful nasty thing that there is not also a person whose kink that is, the idea that covering something up won’t make people obsessed with finding out what it looks like underneath, the surface level understanding of Sauron and complete lack of knowledge of the Silmarillion and it’s fandom, the fact that Sauron was canonically hot as fuck, the amount of Sauron erotica I have seen, God this post never gets old
The Poster Of The Comment: You don’t see people shipping themselves with Sauron!
The Very Large And Dedicated Community Of Sauronfuckers In The Tolkien Fandom, collectively:
Point. For those who have not read Sillmarilion, Sauron used to look something like this
i have to say “sauron used to be hot” is one of my favorite sauron facts
hear me out: a lotr game but you play as the ring, throwing yourself wantonly into the path of unsuspecting folk and slowly corrupting their minds as the game progresses
it’s a lovely morning in middle earth, and you are a horrible ring.
And he looked at the slain, recalling their names. Then suddenly he beheld his sister Éowyn as she lay, and he knew her. He stood a moment as a man who is pierced in the midst of a cry by an arrow through the heart; and then his face went deathly white; and a cold fury rose in him, so that all speech failed him for a while. A fey mood took him.
‘Éowyn, Éowyn!’ he cried at last: ‘Éowyn, how come you here? What madness or devilry is this? Death, death, death! Death take us all!’ . The Return of the King, J. R. R. Tolkien.
So (according to the concept art book) as the Fellowship travels deeper into Middle Earth, the places they pass through become inspired by progressively older periods of history. The farther along you are in the story, the more ancient the design influences
We begin in The Shire: which feels so familiar because, with its tea-kettles and cozy fireplaces, it’s inspired by the relatively recent era of rural England in the 1800s
But when we leave Hobbiton, we also leave that familiar 1800s-England aesthetic behind and start going farther back in time.
Bree is based on late 1600s English architecture
Rohan is even farther back, based on old anglo-saxon era architecture (400s-700s? ce)
Gondor is way back, and no longer the familiar English or Anglo-Saxon: its design comes from classical Greek and Roman architecture
And far far FAR back is Mordor. It’s a land of tents and huts: prehistoric, primitive, primeval. Cavemen times
And the heart of Mordor is a barren lifeless hellscape of volcanic rock…like a relic from the ages when the world was still being formed, and life didn’t yet exist
And then they finally reach Mount Doom, which one artist described as
“where the ring was made, which represents, in a sense, the moment of creation itself”
He has a general, ball park idea of his age, he can (usually) guess it within 20- 30 or so years. But that’s all.
He lost count somehwere in his first thousandth years of life and never bothered to figure it out again.
However, if you ask him his age he will tell you WILDLY different answers that seem to be randomly selected out of thin air.
Pippin: Legolas, how old are you?
Legolas: I am 8987 years.
Aragorn: Okay no, Ada isn’t even 8000 years old yet. Try again.
Legolas: I am 72 years old.
Aragorn: And you certainly arnt younger than me.
Legolas: I am 678 years old.
Aragorn: I also feel like that is incorrect.
Legolas: I am 3000 years old.
Aragorn: Much more plausible, but still, I think, incorrect.
Legolas: I am exactly 8 years old.
Aragorn: why are you the way that you are
Legolas: 🙂
Elves actually count time in a period called a yén iirc, equivalent to 144 of our years.
So it’s not that Legolas doesn’t know how old he is. He just wants to put things in measurements his friends can understand, but he’s very bad at math.
