peter p: but mr america sir, aren’t you technically only 33? are you sure you qualify for this?
steve, taking a senior citizen parking spot and claiming his 15th senior discount of the day: shut your mouth you’re like 5
broke – the team mocking steve for being ‘old’
woke – steve trying to get into a zoo for free because “fuck it i was born in 1918 I deserve the fucking seniors discount”
living in the countryside really strikes the fear of god into you at the most random moments. you’ll just make eye contact with a cow or stare for too long into a brook and all of a sudden you’ll think something like “these are old bones and i am merely a passing occupant” and then you have to go and put the kettle on to cope
me:
the hare staring at me from across the field: which one of your lives is this?
me, legging it: okay tea time i think
WHO is going to have a subtextually homoerotic swordfight with me that stems from our major unresolved sexual tension
The World Health Organization is going to do what?!
before the endgame rewatch: Thor (2011) dir. Kenneth Branagh
“Whosoever holds this hammer, if he be worthy shall posses the power of Thor.”
abeingofpureenergywithnoweakness:
Living in the 21st century is such a wild time. It’s like hey, did you know bees don’t have lungs? How do I know that? Notre Dame burned down.